So today, December 15th, is my Dad’s 85th birthday. So I really want to wish him a fantastic birthday, and apologise that I cannot be there with him. He’s endured so much this past year. I’m so thankful that he’s still with us.
There were times throughout this year, that I didn’t think he’d be with us. Even thinking about that now upsets me. I managed to get off work early today, I wish I had been able to get to the Gurdwara today and say a prayer to thank Waheguru for him being here. On the drive home, I was talking to my friend who gave me a lift about my dad. What he’s been through this year and how I can vividly remember the pain I felt when he became ill. It’s a struggle sometimes to get up but then I think, this man is still here and is still fighting so why am I being so lazy. If I was living with him he’d kick my ass!
He’s not been home for long but I’m glad he got to spend his birthday surrounded by loved ones. It must’ve meant a lot to him. It means a lot to me, and I’m so far away. So this evening I bought a cupcake and some candles and wished him a happy birthday of my own. This wasn’t my idea, someone special I know suggested I do this (you know who you are) and I’m glad I did.
I think sometimes, why do we celebrate birthdays? Is it a joyful occasion because we are celebrating life? Or that we are remembering the joyous occasion that was when our mother gave birth to us? These days I think it’s us celebrating the fact that we’ve made it another year. We’ve endured another year of this messed up world that we live in. This crazy thing that we call life. It’s like “thank God I survived another fucking year!”. I really don’t know. You’re best not to ask me, I’m a grumpy old man.
This year has been a year of up and downs. More downs than ups sadly, but that’s how it goes sometimes. I won’t dwell on that too much. This is to celebrate the amazing man that is my father. Without him I am nothing. I’m just dust. He has moulded me into the man you see before you. I am proud to call him my father. I would t change him for the world.
So again I wish to say happy birthday to my father, Kesar Singh! I love you more than life itself. I miss you and hope to see you soon father.
Lots of love,
Jas Singh xxx